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3/16/13

Uphill and almost there

This has been  a well traveled,  very long road, littered with lots of obstacles on many different occasions.
Since this climb was gradual, I probably didn't feel it like you normally would if I would have plowed headstrong into it; I pretty much pulled a Frank, I did it my way.
Resistance was futile so I decided to  just "open the gate".( I explained to a fairly new student yesterday, stop stressing so much and just "Have fun with it.")    I did.  I discovered the creativity I was born with, I know I was,  and that unleashed a whole parcel of good things.

I   didn't travel that road by myself.  There were  many pushing me,  some had a harder job than others. Some walked beside me, some body slammed me, some encouraged a little too much ( it was their way :)), some led by example. 
Nonetheless, I appreciated whatever, whoever, and wherever,  the help came from.
My teacher Ms C
I just recently was made Student of the Quarter by my Instructor Ms. C.  She said many nice things, and had her own way of encouraging as well.  She did say they were concerned I wasn't going to make it in the beginning.
That wasn't an option, there was no way I was going to quit.  No way.  I had to do it come hell or high water.  If ever there was a saying more true for me at that time it was that one.
 For anyone who knows me, they should know the fear that kept me from doing ALOT.  Fear is NOT YOUR FRIEND.  We only have one go round and we need to make it/this life count.
What was I afraid of?
  • I was afraid I wouldn't know anything in class.
  • I was afraid I wouldn't understand
  • I was afraid of being laughed at.
  • I was afraid of too much.
I have a different outlook now.  I don't go into things like I know it all.  Because I don't.  If I make a mistake, so be it, I'll learn from it. and so on and so on.
Where on earth did I get such notions.  Personally, I think like many other things they were passed on from various people and some things stuck and others didn't.  I certainly didn't need for that to stick.  But! For anyone reading this, who has something in their life they are itching to do, and fear has kept YOU from doing it...Ask yourself those questions and ...then.........

I did have a younger first example who through her own tough times was a sounding board for me, she's since accomplished many things as well as her first degree.  It's still ongoing for her as her goals have changed and her sights are higher. ( She knows who she is) Atta Girl.
That's me I'm ready to hoist myself up over the wall. LOL.
If you've ever seen the photo of Kilroy, peaking over the top, that's me short of my leg being hoisted on up.  What a picture from behind- let- me- tell- you.  HA!

2 comments:

  1. You know, I think that sometimes we actually go further, faster, when we're older. We acknowledge the fact that we aren't as quick a study as we once were, but we don't give up so easily either. We less afraid of looking a bit silly. Sounds like your course is coming along in leaps and bounds Barb. Well done!

    Ali

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  2. So happy for you. Never let fear hold you back. I know that's hard sometimes but with age comes wisdom, right? Afraid, afraid, afraid? Just plow through and don't let doubts defeat you. If you make up your mind to do something, stuff doubts back where they belong and keep going. You'll be so glad at the finish line!

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